Anonymous...

Dear Anonymous,
Some people say things to your face... others only have the strength to say things behind your back. Either is fine with me.
What I'm confused by, is the type of person who lacks the character to put a name on their opinion, information or accusations.
I share my thoughts, opinions, observations, short stories, personal challenges and much more on an open blog.  I've been doing so for over two years.
If you look back through past entries, you will see that I'm very open about my proudest achievements and most venerable moments alike.
It's safe to say that I've never written anything "anonymously."  My feeling is, if you can't stand behind the words you are saying, maybe you shouldn't be saying them...
Clearly not everyone feels the same way...
I suppose in certain instances; domestic abuse, child safety and witnessing a mob crime you might not want your name attached to the police report for personal safety.
Otherwise, I think it's just lame to attack someone namelessly~
I wrote a post a few days ago about an old friend who is no longer my friend.  I didn't mention their name because, just like posting anonymously, I think publicly bashing is unnecessary. (Until now.)
The point of my blog entry: Enjoy Your Facebook Friends was not to "get back" at an old friend.  It was to release my feelings and move on.  Which is why I started blogging in the first place.
So when I received an "anonymous" reply to my post from the "friend" in question, it only solidified my original feelings:
Some people have the balls to say one thing to your face...
...and another "anonymously."
Here is a post on my public "Wall" of Facebook from the former friend written one year earlier...



























And here is the "anonymous" downfall of our friendship just over a year later...

I will go on the record to say that I am so THANKFUL to have this delusional, self-centered, split personality, raging lunatic out of my life.  You want to act like the hero publicly and bash me "anonymously?" Too funny!
Yours Truly,
Matthew Shaffer

Enjoy Your Facebook Friends.

As suspected, my instinct was correct.

Despite all of my better judgment and intuition, I met up with an estranged friend in need last night.

The evening started off with his passive-aggressive behavior directed at me.
As the night continued, so did his nasty remarks and false accusations.
The evening ended with him inches away from my face, screaming
at the top of his lungs in a crowded bar in Los Angeles.

This should come as no surprise to me-

The majority of our nine year friendship revolved around his need to lash out
at the people he considered his "closest" friends.

The sad fact is, he has completely alienated everyone who actually cared about him.  

I've never met a person who could brag about having over two thousand "friends" on Facebook, while standing alone in a bar after attacking the only person who actually showed up to support him.

As I walked away, I laughed. 

I no longer care what happens to him.
Besides, he doesn't need me...
He has plenty of friends on Facebook!

Conflicted

Do I rise above the bitterness?

Is it worth sitting down to rehash the past?

I'm optimistic and hopeful that people can change-

However it's been my experience that they usually don't,

At least not for very long.

How will this time be different?

Nobody wants to have an eight year friendship end like this...

On the other hand, I don't have the energy to respond after being attacked.

I'm extremely conflicted!

Face Off.

Tonight I came face to face with a former friend.
I'm disappointed that the encounter was strained, to say the least.
When did our love turn to hate?
How does it happen?
It breaks my heart-
Friends should inspire one another not tear them down.
I've always been told that time heals all wounds...
I hope that's true.

Life Is Short!

Life is short!
Tell someone you love how you feel!
To all of your haters, just don't engage.
Eventually they'll spread their hate elsewhere!

I strive everyday to remain a positive support to those I love.
Of course we all have setbacks in our growth and evolution as humans, but the people that are in your world should be there during the good times and the bad.

I never take losing a friend lightly.
My grandma always reminds me,
"Make new friends, but keep the old. New ones are silver, but old ones are gold."

Nevertheless, there are always those people who come into your life when you need them, and leave you when the work gets too tough. I have to make my peace with that.
Not everyone has the strength to communicate without attacking. Not everyone can articulate their feelings in a supportive manner-
I have to release those people, no matter how painful.
I don't have room for anyone in my life that is only around when they need to talk.
I'm looking for someone who is equally invested in listening.
Balance is the key to life, AND friendship.

Good By Old Friend... I Wish You The Best.

Wiped.
Erased.
Deleted.
De-friended.
Un-followed.
Just like that, a friendship ends.
I too have felt the strains on our friendship over the past several months.
I tolerated a great deal. I overlooked the evil truth.
Some people are unwilling to take ownership of their part in a relationship.

I no longer have the time or energy to dance in circles with people who don't respect me enough to communicate in an adult manner. I cannot allow people to scream at me, curse at me and accuse me of things that they are guilty of themselves. I should have imagined that this day would come. I should have known based on the explosive situations I've witnessed between mutual friends.

Nevertheless, I struggled to walk away from the bond that I felt.
In the end, the loyalty is not with me. It is exactly where it's always been- on a selfish adult, incapable of change. A person full of self-hate, rage and the inability to be honest with himself.

In the end, his lack of respect for the eight years of friendship we experienced was made clear when he removed me from all forms of social media. As if we we're sixteen year old girls in love. Which is really funny, because it just occurred to me, maybe that's exactly what he is.
Either way, I stayed true to him and our friendship. I was always honest, even when it was inconvenient for me.
I don't care that we are no longer friends. I'm not upset that he removed me from Facebook or Twitter. I'm just grateful that the chaos and crazy are no longer my problem or concern.

I do hope that he has one person in his life that will tell him the truth. Someone that will be there for him when it really counts. Unfortunately, he is skillful at removing anyone that could actually help him grow as a person or artist. It's just easier for him to destroy the things he'd rather not face.
At least now I no longer have a front row ticket to his self destruction.
Good luck old friend. I honestly wish the best for you.