Them Pains...

The dull but incredibly irritating pain in the forward part of my head is softened only by the rich, sharp rumbling in my stomach;
I Googled “upper stomach pain” to discover that––thanks to years of an ibuprofen addiction––I most likely have a peptic ulcer.
So...I get to deal with that, while on tour.
#TheGlamorousLife

Dive Into Pain––Find Joy.

Some people think that an artist has to live a tortured life in order to create a true masterpiece.
I believe the beauty of a brilliant work of art is not discovered in the pain, but rather through the acceptance of who we are; flawed, insecure, filled with doubt.
Compelled to uncover a deeper sense of joy, artists dive forward into the pain in order to experience the joy that radiates from the awareness––stripped from everything we are all the same: humans in search of inner peace.

Pain To Present

What feels like a deep wound is little more than a scratch.

Once the cut has been cleaned and examined you can distinguish between reacting to a fear based on past experience, and the truth of the moment; the pain is a memory of the past.

As soon as we shift our mind to the present, the pain is released, Now the healing begins.

No Pain, No Gain

The deeper we dive into the pain;
The closer we are to finding a way to move past it and heal.
Avoiding uncomfortable conversations, activities and events prolongs the experience.
Facing circumstances head-on forces us to work through the discomfort and evolve.
The fear we endure from pain is no match for the euphoria we experience once we’ve conquered it.

Defenses Mechanism

The drama is real.

Comedy masks the sadness;

Laughter saves the soul.

Raging Headache

Waking up with a headache after a night of alcohol-free partying feels like eating birthday cake without frosting;
Completely unfair and upsetting!
Allergies suck.

Undone

The damage is done,
Words cut deep.
Actions reveal truth.
There isn’t a drug strong enough to dull the pain;
Or an apology so powerful it would heal the wound.
All we can do is move forward and allow time to ease the memories.

Loss

The pain of losing a loved one is deep and constant.
Rejoice in their memory;
Remember the times they made you laugh or touched your soul.
Find comfort in their peace and celebrate their life.
The pain will linger, but so will the love.

Six Word Essay on Allergies

My eyes itch worse than STD's!
(Not that I would know from experience. I'm just guessing...)

Dear Headache

You are so F_ckin& annoying.
It's interesting how even after three cups of coffee and four Advil,
You continue to plague me.
I've released my stress and now I'm ready for you to move on too!

Cracked!

Woke up with a stiff neck,
Rolled over to crack my back and instant pain ensued!
The older I get, the more my body aches...
Soon, I'll have to do a warm-up just to get out of bed!

The Aftermath...

My visit home was (at times) very difficult, heartbreaking and overwhelming.
Thankfully on the last day, I was able to gain a fresh perspective and achieve some sense of peace-
Gram was having a very good day, so I took the opportunity to share with her my deepest gratitude, love, respect and admiration.  I managed between fighting back tears and snot, to inform her that she was (and continues to be) my number one driving force, inspiration and role model.
I would not have accomplished half of my achievements in life, had it not been for her unending support.
I told her what a brilliant mother and grandmother she is, and that I will never forget her spirt.
When she replied, it was articulate, sensitive, gentle, loving, humorous and emotional.  (Everything my grandma had been before Parkinson’s took over her body.)
We embraced for a long time, and I asked her if she could still dance with me.
“Of course” she replied. Grabbed my waist and held on as her feet began to step touch and sway side to side.  I was delighted.
We danced, I cried.
She then stopped, looked down at her leg and started shaking it rapidly,
simulating the movement that takes over when she’s having and episode,
“See, it even helps me dance!”   she said, referring to the disease.
She started laughing and I joined in.
That’s the most inspiring thing about my gram, she never lets life get her down!
I love her so much.  I have great hope and faith that we will have many more dances before the music ends!

Dance Through The Pain!

Is what I try to tell myself when working with kids half my age...
It's just so upsetting that my body doesn't want to do the things that it used to do with ease!
I've turned into that choreographer who marks everything-
I never thought that day would come.
I've got to get back in shape.
Ballet barre here I come!

I"M IN PAIN!

I'm in so much pain I can't even see straight!
My wisdom teeth are pushing through my gums, and because of it, my entire jaw feels like it's on fire...
Sending me reeling out of control on a self-doubt hate spiral!
I hate allowing negative thoughts or fears to enter my mind.
Making my eyes well up with tears, and my heart feel like it's breaking.
I have to "make it" soon-
If not just for the burning desire inside of me;
Then for better health insurance and more money!

Health, Health, Health.

I exercise because I have to!
Not because I enjoy it!
In fact, I really despise that very idea that in order for me to stay thin and "healthy" I'm required to keep my heart rate up for twenty minutes and stay active;
Anyone who knows me can attest to the point that I would much rather spend my day watching television or lounging by a pool- in either scenario I'd be sipping on wine and over-eating...
Nevertheless, I force myself to get up off my tired, flabby ass and workout. At least four times a week.
Today, I decided I should push myself-
So I took a twenty minute hike up a steep, but scenic road in the gorgeous Hollywood Hills.
I was so inspired by the landscape and the idea that I live and work in La La Land... that I decided to run/jog on the way back home.
I thought I was going to die. Right there on Sunset Boulevard.
I pushed through the pain and made it home...
My knees want to kill me! My back is twisted and torn, and my ass still feels flabby!
Sometimes you just have to ask: "What's the point?"
...But I trust that when I'm old and grey, I'll be happy that I stayed active.