Just Stand Up!

A few years ago, a group of my friends here in Los Angeles started a stand-up troupe. Though we were all actors and had done a lot of sketch comedy and improvisation, most of us had never tried our hand at stand-up comedy...

So naturally it made sense for us to break our comedic cherries together! ... Because nothing is easier than exploring new territory with a group of your closets artist friends, and their HUGE emotional chips. (Present company included!) To make it even more fun, we decided to have weekly meetings in one of the members living rooms and "workshop" ideas and eat a fun "family style" dinner! ...like one big happy family! We called it "Stand-Up Salad" because we were an eclectic group of aspiring comedians who gathered and usually ate salad. (The idea made more sense at the time...)

Nevertheless, the first few meeting were a blast... we laughed, we critiqued, we argued and we drank... a lot!

Then the time came to do our first "gig" together.

I will say this, it was wonderful to have a group of people to go to the clubs with and have that support and laughter... to bad we were the only people at several of the first clubs we performed at!

I remember the very first time I got up, I was on stage and I saw the rest of my group in the audience, a homeless man, and the barista (the venue doubled as a coffee house) whipping up a latte right in the middle of my act... It was too painful, but in many ways was an excellent buffer for what was in store!

The time finally came, after weeks of living room meetings and testing our material at crappy coffee houses and holes in the wall around LA...

We decided to have our first show as: "Stand-Up Salad!" Which we did in a great space above Red Rock Bar on the Sunset Strip!

I was so nervous, we had a packed house and I was second in line to go up... When I heard my

name called a nearly shit my pants, but somehow made it to the stage and actually really enjoyed my set! ...it helped that the room was full of our friends who were drunk and ready to laugh... but all and all I had a blast. There was no question I was going to do it again. Eventually we started doing so well, that we moved into the Friar's Club of Beverly Hills and began performing there.

That's the thing about stand-up, if you have a great experience it's amazing... I would say the best high ever! However, if you bomb- GOD help you! There is nothing worse than being up on that stage alone in a sinking ship... and sometimes there is nothing you can do except plug your nose and go down with it!

Over time our group slowly faded to a glimmer of what we were... (I want to spare all of the gory details as they are too painful for me to EVER relive...) The only thing that is important to know is that; friendships suffered, there was a failed reality TV show and I had a really bad set one night and vowed I would, "NEVER DO STAND-UP AGAIN!"

You know that old saying, "Never say never" ...well dammit I should have listened!

I don't know if it's because I'm a glutton for punishment, a masochist or if I just love a good challenge... but something inside of me is dying to get back up and try it again. I'm not one to shy away from a risk, and I really think life is too short to waste it wishing I would have given it another shot... so I'm gonna go for it!

Let's just hope I don't suck! ...again.

Green!

When I was growing up the color green was always my favorite color! Everything in my closet was green. Green sweaters, green corduroy pants, green Vans, green stripped polo shirts... You name it I owned it! In fact, it got so bad that when my mom and grandma took me shopping for school clothes they had to bribe me with toys and money, just so I wouldn't pick only green things.
As I got older, I started to diversify my wardrobe... if you look in my closet now, you will see every color in the rainbow (Except orange! Orange looks awful on me!)
Nonetheless, green still remains my favorite color to wear! Just look at almost any head shot or picture taken of me, you'll notice a common theme: Green.
Green is the color of money, nature, the environment, rebirth, love and lust! Green also happens to be my birthstone: the Emerald! (May 4, 19none of your business.) Please note: green is also the color of this link.
Sure, green is also associated with envy and evil in comic book hero's... But aren't we all a little bit evil?
My favorite reason I love green: My eyes are hazel green. So anytime I'm wearing even a hint of green my eyes become the exact same color as the color I'm wearing... How cool is that?

Plus, I just found out that green eyes are "the least common color!"
Happy St. Patrick's Day!

Be Yourself...

How much longer can I hide from the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth?
We all keep secrets in our lives... Some are well guarded and may even die when we do... Others are shared only with close friends and family, then there are those that we even hide from ourselves.
The degree in which we manipulate the truth from the world is an interesting thought to me...

I'm a control freak and the idea of releasing too much information about myself and losing everything because of it may be my greatest fear!

The balance between who we are and how we are defined is delicate.
In large part, people believe what they are told. ...and why shouldn't they?
I'm all too aware that the things that I keep private, are one in the same with why the people who know me well think I'm funny and creative. (Their words not mine.) My fear is that my over guarded nature may be holding me back from getting further along in my career.

A good friend and colleague in the business just confided in me recently. She said, "I'm so glad to see the real you! You're so talented, funny and relaxed! You really stand out in a room... For so long I just thought you were too uptight and afraid to let go. The real you is so much more interesting and enjoyable!"

It was very hard to hear because I take great pride in my ability to bring the real "me" to every situation. I was confident that I always brought the best part of my personality to every aspect of my life. When she shared her thoughts with me I realized that I was not as open and authentic with people as I believed I was, and it might be holding me back from living up to my true potential.

Ironically, the very things that allow me to stand out from the crowed and might be the final thrust that launches my career... may also define my career in one specific and narrow minded way.
Which sends me into a panic of epic proportions-

I think that as I get older, and I work in this business longer, I realize that the more unique, honest and unafraid I become; the more I've accomplished. So maybe it's time to give in to the real me one hundred percent! I've certainly NEVER apologized for who I am. However, I do know that I have walked away from opportunities because I was worried that it might have a negative effect on future career goals.

Not that I regret my past decisions- I just have a more clear (and I think mature) point of view now: The more confident I become in showing the world my authentic self... the more the world wants to see me! Life is too short to fear what people think, especially because they're going to think what they want anyway! So I might as well have fun and show the world my "A" game, so that at least it's a fair competition.

At the end of my life I just want to know that I followed my dreams and entertained people doing so!

Eat, Drink... You Know The Rest!

There is a time in life for restrain and a time in life to live to the max!
Tonight, I loosened the belt and gave in to an excellent night of;
too much food, too much booze and just the right amount of merry!
I had a wonderful evening with friends and family in LA.
...makes me grateful to be alive!

Text Me Gram!

I talk to my Grandma every day, and have for most of my life. I find great comfort in her voice and wisdom.
Recently, my Grandpa passed and as you can imagine, as painful as it was on me- it was tenfold for her.
They were happily married for fifty-four years. I've never meet a couple more in love, and I doubt I ever will.
After my Grandpa passed, I realized that life for her was going to be completely new-
...Just a few days ago I found out that my Grandma had never pumped gas before!
(She confided in my sister that "Pops" always did that for her...)
My sister called my crying, and my sister NEVER cries.
It's just little things that continue to spring up now that Grandpa isn't here.
Make no mistake, my Grandma is a very intelligent woman! Strong, passionate, creative and brilliant... Nevertheless, there are certain things that she never had to do, because when you love someone as much as my Grandpa loved her, you take care of them.
...Another thing my Grandpa used to do is remind my Grandma to take her pills... A few years back my Grandma was diagnosed with Parkinson's disease. A devastating blow for everyone to hear, fortunately the pills that she has to take four times a day seem to really help fight the signs and allow her to function on a semi-normal basis (early morning and late nights are tough on her) but like I said, Gram is a tough cookie!

Once my Grandpa was gone, I realized that she would not remember to take her pills... which would cause the disease to rapidly take over her nervous system, and I am no where ready to lose her too!
I decided that my dad already has enough on his plate being the only son, and my sister has done so much for Gram already that I would be responsible for calling her on a regular basis and remind her when to take her pill...
I already call her once a day anyway... why not make it four! As luck would have it, my lack of a "real" job gives me privileges that most people don't have... time.

It's hard to believe four months have passed, and Gram and I have this down to a science. Because my time zone is an hour earlier in Los Angeles (the rest of my family live in Colorado) I set my alarm to go off an hour before... the first one wakes me up everyday at six a. m. sharp! I roll over, call Gram and she says, "Thank you! I'll take it right now... Love you!" and I hang up and go back to sleep.

But then there are those days when I have a mild panic attack. ...Today was one of them!
I go to call her on her home phone, and there is no answer. Naturally, I call her cell phone... and again, no answer!
The fear doesn't set in right away; first I call my dad, then my sister, then my dads wife, then my Grams neighbors... then after none of them know where she is, I start to freak!

She could be lying on the bathroom floor or on the side of the road for all we know! I'm all the way in California, so I'm no help. So I begin to dial 911... just as my Grandma calls.

Gram: "I'm here babe, I'm okay... I'm sorry. I was in church and forgot to turn my phone back on. I'm sorry I worried you!"

Me: "Gram, JUST LEAVE YOUR PHONE ON IN CHURCH! ...Everyone at my church does! So should you! I'm sorry, I don't mean to yell at you, but you had me worried sick! I almost called the police!"

(On a side note: I have to stop yelling at my Grandma.. She's seventy-four years old, she's not a child!)

I decided to come up with a plan. I'm going to teach my Grandma how to text message... This way, she can leave her phone on silent no matter where she goes, and I will always be able to get ahold of her! I can text message her to take her pill and she can text me back! I'm not exactly sure how I'm going to do this from LA, but where there's a pill there's a way!
I never thought I'd see my Grandma using a cell phone... so I don't think it will be that great a leap for her to figure out the text world. Let's just hope she doesn't find out about sexting!
Oh who am I kidding... she watches Dateline! She probably already knows!
I love you Gram!
P. S. It's time to take your pill!

On My Career...

Happily working to make it big, one low budget short film at a time...

Old Habits Die Hard...

We can't be perfect everyday, right?
Despite the fact that the past two months have been both a success and joy for me... I'm disappointed in myself today!
I realize that no matter how hard we try, we are going to have "off" days or moments where our spirits are down...
...and I know that focusing on the negative energy is much easier than forcing myself to seek out the positive.
What I keep trying to remind myself is that; although it's difficult to release the bad energy and just let go... When I have done so in the past, I experience almost an instant turn in fortune!
...so I'm not sure why I can't talk myself into giving up on the nasty ch'i and smile today...
I guess I just have to chalk it up to old habits...

I thought that writing about the issue would help me find some clarity, but all it has done is make me more upset that I can't even put a stream of thoughts down on blog, without judging the importance of what I'm saying or how poorly it's written.

I'm being a crazy freak right now! I just need to relax, take a deep breath, smile and let it go!
Okay, I'm letting it go in 3, 2, 1.... It's gone! ...it's not really gone, but I'm going to pretend it is!

Pick Up The Phone!.!.!. Please!

Why don't people pick up the phone?
I know EVERYONE on the planet owns one...
...I don't think it's too much to ask that my family and friends be at my beckon call...
Twenty-four, seven, seven days a week!!!
Isn't that why we have mobile phones? So that we can use them anytime, anywhere!
Uuuhhhggg!
I just need to ask you a quick question...
Fine! Don't answer!
IT'S NOT IMPORTANT!
Never mind!

My Car Is Homeless...

I can't even begin to describe the utter bliss I will feel when I no longer have to set an alarm to wake up and move my car twice a week!

There are so many perks to living in the Sunset Plaza / West Hollywood area of Los Angeles;

Great restaurants, shopping, night life, drug stores (I mean the kind like CVS or Rite-Aid not the kind with the big neon green signs in the shape of a leaf... though we have those too!)

Truly everything is within reach!

...everything, except parking!

Because I live in a desirable neighborhood, ALL of our street parking is permit only.

Which basically translates to this: Plan on spending about $100.00 a year on passes that you

affix to the windshield of your car, that give you permission to park on specific streets in the area surrounding your house...

Then, plan on driving around FOREVER to find a spot that isn't already taken by a fellow friend or neighbor! Then there are those people who don't even live on the street, but take the spot because it's free and they don't want to pay the $10.oo to park at The Viper Room or Whisky A Go Go... (They learn the hard way about permit parking when their car is towed and it cost them $350.oo to recover it from the impound lot with several dents!)

But for me, hands down the worst part of permit parking is the street sweeping twice a week.

If I had a place to move my car to, I would have parked it there in the first place...

There are twice as many car owners than parking spots on most of the street in Los Angeles, so on days that you have to "pick a side" to park on, it's like a fight just to get a spot!

...I'm not complaining... Honestly, I LOVE where I live.

I just don't love that my car is homeless!

I just look forward to the day when I can move a little further up the Hollywood Hill and my car will finally have the garage it deserves!

Don't You Hate It...

When you're in bed late at night, justing getting ready to fall asleep...

...and a stroke of brilliance pops into your head!

Too tired to wake up and fully realize the flash of pure gold that is sure to revolutionize your way of life, and possible millions of others too!

You don't even have the energy to roll over, turn on the lamp that sits next to your bed, and scratch down the idea in your "Amazing Ideas Before You Go To Bed" notebook that you bought for these very occasions...

You think to yourself, "it's okay, there's no way I'm gonna forget this!"

...then you wake up and you realize that you had this instance of utter genius, and you can't remember a damn thing!

Not even a flicker of the memory remains...

Well, that happened to me last night!

And I couldn't be more pissed off at my "glorious" idea and my lazy self!

Jonathan Ames Inspired Six Word Essay...

Los Angeles drivers really make me rage!

Bummer!

Oscar night is here! ...and I'm not.
Well, I'm here... Just not there.
...and by there, I mean at one of the four Oscar parties I was invited to... Not counting the one I usually hold every year too!
Instead, I'm stuck at DIA airport waiting to board a delayed flight... And because it's Sunday, ALL of the bars at the airport are closed, and because not a TV in sight playing the telecast!
So, I'm just going to have to hold my own Oscar party at 3 AM when I get home...
What a bust!
Oh well... Thank God for DVR!
Party at my place... 3 AM! I'll make pancakes!

Don't Judge Me!

I'm sitting in a theatre in the heart of the beautiful Rocky Mountains in Colorado Springs, CO.
For the past ten years of my life I've spent the better part of my weekends each year flying to cities all across the country working as an adjudicator for several of the nations top talent competitions.
Think "American Idol" meets "So You Think You Can Dance" with a splash of "Star Search"...
It's not as glamorous as it sounds. In fact, I honestly hate crushing the dreams of future show biz hopefuls!
There is nothing worse than sitting in a theatre watching someone perform their guts out...
...and I have to tell them that their guts are only worth a bronze medal.
I've been in the entertainment industry since I was ten years old (which I imagine is one of the qualifications that makes me a perfect candidate for this job) nevertheless, I have heard awful things along my journey...
Thank god for my super supportive parents who told me that I was perfect no matter what! ...along with my ability to live in a completely delusional world where I love everything I do, plus my drive to prove all those assholes that told me I'd never make it wrong!
Yet here I sit, doing exactly what's been done to me!
Though I must admit, I would never say some of the things that I've heard along my journey as an artist...
For example: I'd never say, "You'd be really talented if you just lost weight!"
Or, "You're really funny, but I think it's always going to come down to you and someone else, and the other person is always going to get the job..."
Just soul crushing statements, that have no relevance.
So please don't judge me for further encouraging the negative energy that goes hand in hand with the entertainment business. After all, I need to make a living too. Plus, from time to time I'm actually extremely inspired by the talent, passion and drive that I see in these young competitors... They remind me that there is hope for the next generation of artist and reinvigorate my idealistic outlook on the industry.
...still, it is very hard not to share with them that I'm their ghost of Christmas future! (Sorry Amy Claire I had to steal that line, it's too great not to use!)

...and I'm off!

My bags are packed, my boarding pass is printed and my ride is ready to go!
I'm off for my first (of several) gigs out of LA for the Spring season...
Today is extra special, because I will be flying into Colorado Springs, CO-

What makes Colorado so special you ask?
Well, aside from me... everyone in my family lives in CO!
So tonight, before the long weekend of work and no sleep, I get to have dinner with my dad and his wife and my Grandma Shaffer!
I think we'll have Mexican food!
...it's the little things in life that mean the most. (I'm talking about my seeing my family, not eating the Mexican food...)

On The Road Again...

Uuugghhh! I really hate flying now! There was a time when all I'd dream about was traveling;

family vacations, exploring new cities and being on tour with a show... I loved to plan my trip, pack my suit case just right, and set off to the airport.

Oh, how times have changed!

Don't get me wrong, I still LOVE to vacation, see family and of course when I get to travel for free because of a show I'm in...

Unfortunately, I DREAD going to airports nowadays. Between the stress of getting to the airport, going through the massive security line, barely tolerating the nasty (and really underpaid) airline and FAA employees and then being shoved on an oversold flight, in a middle seat with no air, food or entertainment!!! FLYING SUCKS!

It makes me really wish one of my childhood fantasies would come true.... That I could channel my inner "Hero" superpower and be able to fly on my own!

Nevertheless, I must wake up tomorrow and battle my way to the airport as my touring schedule as an adjudicator for a popular talent competition begins a new season!

I usually end up having a blast, and I'm always inspired by the talent I get to see each year as a new generation of artist compete to find their voice... I just DESPISE flying!

Fun Day On The Set!

What an excellent day! There is nothing better than waking up, driving to a set, and doing what you love...

Today I got to work with Megan Mullally, Rob Corddry, Malin Akerman, David Wain and more... on the set of the new TV show "Childrens Hospital" which will air this summer on Cartoon Networks: Adult Swim line up!

I was hired as a choreographer, thanks to a recommendation by my fantastic friend, Stacy Jorgensen!

I had a brilliant time and was able to snap a few photos too! It's a good thing I did, because in some cases I think pictures speak louder than words... Check out the joy in my

face in this one:

Organized OCD

I admit it. I am super OCD about organization! I believe everything has a place, and it should be put in it's place when not in use.

I come by this terrible OCD very honestly. My mom drilled it in my head from the time I was eight years old.

...MATTHEW JOSEPH SHAFFER!!!! ....GET IN HERE AND CLEAN UP THIS ROOM! ...AND YOU BETTER NOT STUFF ANYTHING IN THE CLOSET. FOLD IT AND PUT IT IN THE DRAWER OR BIN IT BELONGS IN!!!

...yes mom.

So really it's all her fault! Nevertheless, at almost thirty two years of age, I still stress out if I leave something undone. There are times when I can't even leave the house for a meeting or appointment unless I've properly; labeled, cross-referenced and filed something.

In fact, it's become a game I play. How fast can I: balance my check book, record the earnings in my Excel spreadsheet, label the category, make a note of it in iCal, and file it?

As of this morning, I'm down to almost 3 minutes flat for all daily balance activities!

But, in the grand tradition of trying to release and evolve... I'm forcing myself to relax a bit on the rules of proper organization. ...as painful as it is to see a stack of un-opened, un-filed, un-recorded bills and statements... I MUST REBEL and say NO! Filing is just not that important!

...But what is important is making the new labels for my matching white binders that I store all my important emails in (once they've been highlighted and three-hole punched of course...)

Got to go, the new label maker came in yesterday, and it has a cool new custom color preference!

Spring is In The Air...

Two months down... and here we are; March 1, 2010!

Spring is in the air! The sun is shining, the birds are singing, and the aroma of pollinated flowers fills the air.

I love springtime in Los Angeles! ...Who am I kidding, I love springtime everywhere! I love new beginnings. For me, that is what the spring represents. A fresh start. Beautiful new growth.

The past two months of this wonderful new decade have been excellent to me. You really can accomplish everything you want if you; stay positive, stay focused and work toward each goal.

Sunday!

Sunny

Uplifting

Naps

Doing nothing

Awesome

Yummy brunch!

I love Sundays...

I LOVE Folgers Coffee!

...and not just because I shot a commercial for the brand... But because I honestly love it!

It really is the best part of waking up!

The aroma that fills the air instantly transports me back in time...

I remember sitting around the kitchen table in either one of my Grandparents' house, that rich, bold, delicious smell lingered in the air. One by one members of my family would wake up, come out of the bedroom and pour a cup of coffee.

It was long before Starbucks, and before it was really "okay" or "cool" for 6 year olds to drink coffee... (now days I think kids come out of the womb slurping down mocha frappuccino's!)

I remember both of my grandmas were ready and willing to fill my coffee mug with a huge pour of milk, a couple table spoons of sugar and a splash of Folgers Coffee!

...It was AMAZING!

So it was easy to shoot this commercial, I had a lot of sense memory to brew from!

Worked Like A Charm!

...I was so excited about my news, that I had to write todays blog entry A.S.A.P!

I'm not sure if it was beginners luck, or if Craigs List is always this amazing...

But within 10 minutes of posting my ad, I sold my little green machine!

In fact, not only did I sell it, but I got what I wanted for it too!

Crazy how many people called within the hour I posted the ad, but even more remarkable was

how many people called throughout the day! Even after I removed the add. I guess a lot of people are looking to buy cheap used cars... And I for one, could not wait to get rid of just that!

So alas, my Chevy convertible is no more!!!

Yes, I had some fun times in that car... (I love driving along the beach in a convertible!)

However, I will not miss it. Especially in the rain!

Goodbye. Farewell. ...and thank you Craigs List!

There's A First Time for Everything!

Most of us are familiar with Craigs List... and if you're anything like me, your mind goes to the first thing you ever heard about Craigs List- which for me was that Craigs List was basically a national online escort service. Where people post nude and semi-nude photos of themselves and hook up with other people in their area. Then of course, I remember the first time I went to the site myself... I was desperate for a job, and a close friend of mine recommended Craigs List as a great way to find quick work! Quick work of course leads to quick pay...

...and the pay off was great. I actually scored to great independent contract jobs (as a promotional spokes person) for two very large corporations in the U.S.

I guess people (including large companies) realize the effectiveness of a site where millions come to you...

So this morning when I woke up and realized I still have my little green machine (the 1998 Chevy Cavalier I used to drive) still parked out side my house, I decided I needed to take action.

After all, the car is not going to sell itself, and I need to make some cash to pay for the new one I now own...

Naturally I thought about selling it on Craigs List! But because I've never sold anything on the site before, I was a tiny bit overwhelmed!

I have to say, it could not have been any easier! I simple went to Craig List and selected "post" picked my category: For Sale and clicked on "cars." From there I added the information I wanted to include in the add and uploaded a few pictures... clicked finish and the post is now live to millions of people!

Trying new things can be fun! And hopefully I'll be able to sell my car fast!

Check out my very first Craigs List ad by clicking this link. Please note the ad will only stay up for one week... so check it out soon!

Why I Love My Dog...

I have a five year old Yorkshire Terrier called Ginger.

She happens to be the cutest dog on the planet, and I'm not bias at all!

I love:

Her oversized perky ears,

The way her tail wiggles from side to side faster than hummingbird wings,

The look in her eyes when she knows you're talking about her,

The way she dances; hop, jump, circle turns when you walk through the front door,

Her ability to do Yoga: Nobody does downward dog like Ginger after a long nap in the sun,

Her willingness to fall asleep on almost any strangers lap,

The constant tongue licks on ANY surface for no apparent reason,

I could go on forever! I believe all animals are amazing, but Ginger is truly special. She's the best dog I've ever had!

New Car! ...sort of!

I'm so excited! Today, I got a new (gently used and well taken care of) car!!!

My very own Range Rover Freelander!!! ...I know, I know... Say no to the SUV.

But if you've read any of my previous blog entries about my green little chevy convertible...

you'll know that ANYTHING is a step in the right direction.

Especially, a really nice, well maintained car like this! Plus, it's been in the family, so I know the car history!

No more fear of driving on the 101 South and losing my soft top, or waking up to find that my car won't "wake up!"

I'm happy, because I have a luxury car now, and I didn't have to pay a luxury price!

Proving yet again, that 2010 is that start of a wonderful new decade!

On a side note, I'm also pleased to announce that my website just got a facelift! I thought it was time to spruce up the website and add the new pictures of me that the talented Alex Fox shot!

If you get a chance check out this link and let me know what you think!

And remember... "You can look and you will find it. You can not look and you will find it. That which is yours will surly come to you!" Say the Zen!

Nice Shot!

You may remember I took some new head shots last week...

Ordinarily I dread going through the photos to find the one or two I will inevitably end up using...

However, this time I was honestly very pleased with how the shots turned out! I feel I got exactly what I was aiming for, and you may have noticed, I'm already using one of the new shots as my new and improved blog logo!

Check out the rest here and let me know what you think!

To quote the brilliant Pee Wee Herman; "Why don't you take a picture... it'll last longer!"

Thanks to Alex Fox the photographer who shot them, these just might last a while!

Family Dinner...

Sunday dinner was amazing...

I ate too much, drank too much and had a hell of a time!

Now I'm full and ready for bed.

Good night stars, goodnight air

good night noises everywhere!

The Road to the OSCARS!!!

There is only 15 Days 07 Hours 32 Minutes and 05, 04, 03... Seconds until the 82 Annual Academy Awards Show!!!! Being held Sunday, March 7 2010 on ABC!

...and I have nothing to wear yet!!!

I've been watching the OSCARS since I was a toddler. My first actual memory was around 5 or 6 years old... I stood up on the coffee table in our living room and started giving an acceptance speech. Too bad that was before the cam corder, the flip cam or the iPhone w/ video... I would have loved to hear that speech now!

I have my favorites picked and I'll share them as we get closer to the show...

But for all things OSCARS check out this link!

...And happy Saturday!

Picture Day!

Do you remember school picture day? It was always a big deal in my family.

Mom would take my sister and I out for a new outfit and a hair cut the week before...

I never understood how kids would show up in a stained t-shirt or bed head (before it was cool to have bed head...) Remember those cheap plastic combs they would hand out? Or the gross woman who would lick her hand and then try to pin down your cow lick? ...maybe that only happened to me.

My family loves pictures... I got it from my mom, who got it from her dad. My Grandpa Smith always has the coolest, latest, greatest camera... and brings it everywhere he goes!

So you think I'd be used to striking a pose... Okay, who am I trying to fool right now? I love to smile for a camera... Usually.

The one exception is: Head shots!

I dread head shots... They are so expensive. No one ever likes the same shot. I always get an ingrown hair on my neck, always in the same spot (and sure enough it's there this morning!) Plus, it's just so much more fun to take picture when you have friends and family in them with you...

Uhhhhgggg. Wish me luck!

I am Me!

One of the most difficult challenges I have in my life, is my self-inflicted pressure to compare myself to other people. I'm not exactly sure where it came from, but I'm positive nothing good has ever come from it!

So today, I'm going to do my damnedest to compare myself to ME!

I've been grateful for the cool adventures that have come my way so far this year, and I can only believe that I'm receiving them because I've released the doubts and negative energy that had a way of piling up over the years...

I have a wonderful opportunity today, and that comes with a great challenge...

To trust myself completely! I'm going for it! Why not?

In the words of Helen Keller; "Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing!"

You Know You're Ghetto When...

You know you're ghetto when you have to use electrical tape, to seal the gapping hole around the window on your car's convertible top...

Let's be honest, if you've read any of the other blog entries about my little green machine, then you'll understand that, though I'm grateful my car gets me from point A to point B safely...

It's not the worlds best car...

But last night, the final layer of frosting was added! I was driving home from a long night of rehearsal deep in the heart of the valley. I'm in the fast lane on the 101 South, headed back to my side of the hill, when I feel a slight chill in the air. Which is strange, because it was very warm in LA yesterday, and I didn't have the air conditioning on...

I'm looking around my car to see where the cool sting of air might be coming from...

"Did I leave a window down?" ...and then I look up in my rearview mirror and notice it!

A huge hole where the fabric attaches to the back window on the bottom left side!

...Not wanting to throw ANYMORE money at this car... I decided to go down this morning a survey the damage.

The result: It's not good, but I don't think it's anything a little black electrical tape and a prayer can't handle...

Oh, how I long for the day when I can buy a brand spankin' new car!

I love LA!

Days like today make me so happy I live in LA.
I woke up with the sun shining down on my face. Got out of bed and ready to greet the day...
Got in my convertible and drove over Laurel Canyon to make my way to a production meeting in the valley.
I arrived at the location, a non-functioning hospital that serves as a set for television shows and movies, and met with one of the coolest, wittiest, funniest director/actor/writers in LA...

David Wain!

We finalized the details of an episode of "Childrens Hospital" that I will be choreographing! It's a new show coming to Adult Swim on the Cartoon Network! (I booked the job thanks to an amazing friend and fellow actress/choreographer/producer Stacy Jorgensen! Thanks again Stacy!!!)
Yep, days like today are the ones that keep me going in LA... They're few and far between, so we have to enjoy them!

The Day After...

Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
Valentine's day is over and the mall is a zoo.
It's Presidents' Day so kids have no school,
...shopping today- I'd rather drowned in a pool!
(sorry, it's all I got today! Shopping at the Century City mall took it out of me!)

Love...

I woke up and thought I was in OZ... there was a little man baby walking around in my house wearing a diaper and holding a bow and arrow? That's when it hit me... (the arrow.)

I remember in elementary school making little heart cutouts with lace, glitter, and a lot of crazy glue... My mom would take us to Target and buy pre-made Smurfs Valentine's cards and I would use those as a template for each of the "one of a kind" designs I hand-crafted.

Then Mrs. Brown, my 3rd grade teacher, would help us hang our overly decorated white paper lunch sack with our name on it, up on a bulletin board. On Valentine's day, each of us would walk around the room and secretly drop little love notes to our admired classmates.

As an adult, Valentine's day gets a little more complicated... and a lot more expensive. We go out of our way to buy; flowers, chocolate, tickets to movies, fancy dinners, bottles of wine, etc...

However, my favorite Valentine's day memories, are the ones that were homemade and fr

om the heart. No matter how much or little we spend, the idea is the same... Valentine's Day is another opportunity to tell the people we hold dear in our life just how much we love them!

Lazy...

Wow, today I had one of the laziest days in a long time.

Aside from a quick rehearsal this morning and a fast dash to the supermarket, I spent the entire day on my couch.

...and I don't regret a damn minute of it! Okay, well maybe I regret watching the 2001 remake of Planet of the Apes, but even that had Helena Bonham Carter... so it wasn't a total loss!

So that's it... I'd write more, but I need to get back to the couch... Baby Mama isn't going to watch itself!

Butterflies

Butterflies, excitement, nerves, a rush of adrenaline,

Full of hope and positive energy,

Just going to have a blast,

The rest is out of my control.

Today is going to rock!

I'm looking forward to the next adventure!

Is It Just Me...

Is it just me? Or is the month of February flying by faster than Star Jones chasing after a bucket of fried chicken?

In my opinion, February is always a month that ends before it started... I know it's only a few days shorter than most of the other months- but I really need those extra days!

I guess February has it rough because it has to follow January, and in January, everyone is eager for the coming year! Full of hope, excitement and follow through on New Year's resolutions... Toward the end of January, I think most people find some sort of routine to get back into, and before you know it, you're back in a groove and it's February 15th and you realized you've missed Valentine's Day... and you're happy about that, but sad that half a month is gone!

Today is February 11, 2010. Not counting today, I have 17 full days to make the most of February! I'm going to rise to that challenge and do something really super awesome and big, so that February doesn't feel like "that month" that everybody hates! Happy February!

Fresh Cut Grass.

Isn't it amazing how a single smell can transport you back to a wonderful moment in your life?

I was walking my dog Ginger this morning, and the neighbors gardener was trimming the lawn...

Instantly I flashed back to my childhood;

spending the summers with my grandparents and helping my grandpa with the yard work, AYSO soccer practice in 7th grade and picnics at the park with my friends after school.

I live for moments like that throughout the day. It's refreshing to know that no matter how far away from a beautiful experience you are in life, one smell, song or taste will unleash the sense memory of the special events in your life.

Did Somebody Say Starbucks?

Okay, so there once was a time when I had a little addiction to Starbucks coffee...

It wasn't that bad... I'd only stop in 3 or 4 times a day... everyday... for several years...

But it was while I lived in New York! That's what you did in NY... You left your 200 square foot apartment that you paid $2000.00 a month for, to eat out and spend most of your day in Starbucks writing, networking and waiting for auditions!

At one point my dad asked me how much I spent on Starbucks coffee a month, and I'm sad to report that after adding up one months receipts from Starbucks... the grand total was well over: $350.00.

Soon after that little realization, I decided to cut back. I'd only allow myself to go once a day, and that soon trickled into once a week, and eventually, I was only going to Starbucks a few times a month!

When I moved back to Los Angeles, it became even easier to skip Starbucks, because it was actually enjoyable making coffee at home and hanging out on my balcony!

...Long story short, I still very much love going to Starbucks! It's in my blood, and it makes me very happy! Sure, I try not to go that often. However, I must admit that I sneak in little Starbucks runs here and there...

Today, I'm excited because I get to see one of my best friends from NY (who actually lives in Cali but I NEVER get to see her) and we're meeting at a Starbucks!

It's like a wrinkle in time... If only I could go back and save that $350.00 a month... I'd own a Starbucks by now!

Sun

Oh how I love the sun in LA!

The sky is clear and blue,

Palm trees swaying in the wind,

Crisp ocean smell-

Mountains with snow capped peaks set a beautiful backdrop

to the towering skyscrapers downtown,

The Hollywood sign looks magical-

with it's white shinny glow,

Short sleeve T-shirts in February,

This is the town where dreams come true!

...sometimes.

Game Day!

Super Bowl XLIV New Orleans Saints vs. Indianapolis Colts

Did you know that Super Bowl Sunday is the second largest day of food consumption in the U. S. every year? ...Second only to Thanksgiving Day.

Did you know that the Super Bowl was first played on January 15, 1967 as part of a merger agreement between the NFL and the rival AFL?

Did you know that this is the first time since they were founded in 1967 that the New Orleans Saints are playing in the Super Bowl?

Did you know that one of my best friends Amy Claire is from Louisiana and LOVES football and is going to watch this game with the same enthusiasm as a little girl opening a Barbie Doll on Christmas Day?

Did you know the only reason I really go to Super Bowl parties is for the chips and dip... and the half-time show? ...and the alcohol.

Happy Super Bowl Sunday! Go Saints!

You Can't Force Magic!

What can I say? I can't force something that isn't happening...

It's funny, because I'm rarely at a loss for words or something to talk about in life. However, there are those random days when I subconsciously decided that it's my turn to shut up and let somebody else talk...

Today is one of those days. I can't think of anything wonderful, important or funny to write about.

And I hate forcing dialogue just to hear myself speak (or write,) then it becomes like watching Elisabeth Hasselbeck on The View...

So friends, today is a rare day where I'm going to shut up and listen! ...maybe.

Pizza Day!

Do you remember pizza day?

All through elementary and middle school here in Southern California, every Friday was Pizza Day! (As I'm sure it was everywhere else in the country...)

I'm not sure if it's the rain or the fact that I've deprived myself of pizza for a long time...

But like one of Pavlov's dogs, I started salivating the minute I woke up this morning!

I thought about calling Dominos right when I woke up, but suddenly realized it was 7 am and I thought perhaps I should try to wait until 11 or 12 before I filled my body with unhealthy, greasy, cheesy, doughy, deliciousness topped with extra sausage, pepperoni and crushed red peppers!

Wait... What time is it? 10:20 am? That'll do!

Happy Friday!

Encouragement

Who doesn't love a little encouragement now and then?

...I know many of my friends must think I'm crazy nowadays. Most likely because of my conscious decision to actively be a more positive person.

I think (and I could be wrong) that I've always been a pretty happy go lucky guy... but there were always those moments of rage...

This year, I decided to try a different approach, and so far it's really paid off.

One of my little projects has been to post a positive though, quote or several words of encouragement on my status update on Facebook.

I must admit the saying, "What you give comes back to you tenfold" or something like that... is so true!

It feels so nice to put a positive vibe out in the internet universe and hear the wonderful comments my friends are sharing with me in response!

My Grandpa Smith used to tell me, "If you make one person smile each day, you're doing a good job!"

Grandpa always makes me smile!

So I thought I'd share one more positive thought today: Enthusiasm is a driving force that overcomes all obstacles.

Have a wonderful day!

The Question of the Day Project

I'm not sure how long it's going to last, or if anyone will even find it interesting... However, for a while now I've been toying with the idea of posting a "Question of the Day" segment online somewhere.

The idea is that I will film myself asking a random question each day and then post it online. The questions may be anything from: "Do you like Mexican food and why?" "Does anyone really care what ads are played during the Super Bowl?" or "Should health care be controlled by government?"

In other words; the question might be serious one day and goofy the next. My goal is to get people talking and (hopefully) posting their own filmed answers or comments!

The only thing I was unsure about is where to post?! I knew I wanted to keep my Blog more a form for my writing and thoughts... with an occasional video post here and there.

I also knew I didn't want to post the "Question of the Day" to my YouTube page because I really like to keep that for my sketches and short film projects.

Finally, I decided that it might be fun to start another YouTube page dedicated to whatever crazy, fun projects that I want to experiment with... and that is exactly what I did.

The FunnyShaffer Show is my new YouTube channel. (I mean who doesn't want their own online talk show right?)

So, in addition to my daily blog entry, I'm also going to do my best to ask a question each day, and maybe even have some special guest questions too!

Rise and Shine!

I'm trying out this new thing where I wake up at 7 a.m. everyday, even if I don't have to be anywhere until later in the day...
I'll be honest, I'm much more of an evening person, however, in the tradition of living a full life, I decided that waking up at 10 or 11 a.m. is probably not utilizing each day the best I could.
At first, waking up so early was NOT fun! In the past I would wake up at 5, 6 or 7 a.m. for two reasons: to go to work or take an early flight to save money! Never because I wanted to.
It's different now though. I actually enjoy the time I have in the morning. I feel like I have twice as much time each day to accomplish my goals, work out, spend time doing the things I love and still get some work done!
In fact, the only down side to waking up early in my opinion is that I have more time in the day to overeat!
I'm not sure who coined the phrase that I heard so much growing up: "Rise and Shine!" But, at least now I understand... When I rise early I definitely have more time to shine.

Gone Are The Days...

I remember the days I would go to the bank with my grandparents... We would walk in, and the bank manager would great my grandparents by name, followed with a handshake and a smile. Then, without missing a beat, he would walk over to me, pat me on the head and offer a lollypop!

Gone are the days!

It seems like there's a competition for who can provide the WORST customer service...
Top of the list: AT&T, Chase Manhattan Bank and Time Warner Cable!
...of course I do business with all three!

These big companies don't care about customer service, they don't have to! Because they know people have no other options...
Sure you can switch banks... but that's like jumping from one burning house to another. AT&T doesn't have to worry about their terrible service, because they know if you have the iPhone, you have to stay... And my favorite: Time Warner doesn't care AT ALL!!! They have a monopoly in the city I live, so we have no other cable provider, and we can't get Dish where we live!

I think it's time for me to rewind time and get rid of all this crappy technology that is supposed to make my life easier and faster... All it does is leave me with a headache and make me break a promise to myself, that I would stop raging in the new decade!

... I WANT MY LOLLYPOP DAMMIT!

Friends

For their love and support.
Real to the core.
In good times and bad,
Even when they're busy...
Never let me fall.
Doing whatever it takes to get me through-
So thankful for you all!

Too Much Food!

There's nothing worse than feeling like a stuffed pig,
Sitting in the theatre with my gut hanging over,
Gross!

Why do I continue eating when I'm full?

I'm judging dancers all day long,
But I'm afraid they might be judging me too...

TGIF

Friday. Fun. Friends. Food. Rock Band. Friends. Food. Bed...

Grace Under Fire!

The funny thing I continue to relearn about life is that no matter how confident, happy and balanced you are... there are going to be times where you're kicked down, stomped on, given double black-eyes, internal bleeding, spit on, flipped over and violated and then asked to get up and shine!

It's no wonder as we age, we lose our passion, drive, idealism and self-assured confidence!

It's become my challenge, on a daily basis... to fight the tough fight!

One of my favorite quotes comes from a zen teaching:

Fall down seven times, get up eight.

But to fall down and get back up is only half the battle. Albeit, it's an important part of success-To have the energy and stamina to get up and fight. But you have to maintain the confidence in yourself for which you are fighting to achieve. That can be very tough, when you hear all of your faults from the people who are trying to hold you down, or even make you better for that matter...

What I'm slowly coming to understand is that no matter how positive, driven and focused we are; we will all fall.

The challenge then becomes how to fall with grace, maintain the blows, and then stand up taller than the time before, with even more grace, wisdom, and fuel to steam ahead.

To believe in yourself when everything is going the way you wish is easy to do, and a great feeling. To believe in yourself when very few others do, takes a great deal of faith and trust.

I'm not entirely sure where the confidence and security to "rise above" the barrage of fire aimed at you comes from... but I'm noticing, that it's a lot easier to move forward if you bandage the wounds with a big smile, and remember that those first to attack, are the ones who feel most threatened.

You Try Driving in LA!

Okay, so I know I'm not supposed to rage... and I've really been doing a much better job at slowly releasing the toxic rage that is damned up inside of me...

Until I get behind the wheel!

I can't help it! People cannot drive in LA. It's that simple...

I don't understand how anyone can think it's okay to change lanes without a turn signal, pull out in front of you and then proceed to drive 10 miles below the speed limit or blatantly talk on their cell phone while cutting you off!

Who is giving these drivers their license? ...and why?

But my favorite is when a driver does all of the above listed annoyances... and then honks at you (while talking on their cell phone) like it was your fault!

I'm honestly trying to find ways to stay calm and not freak out on LA drivers- the classical music station I listen to is NOT working...

Any suggestions?

If You're Too Busy To Laugh...

Many years ago, a good friend gave me a little blue book called: "8,789 Words of Wisdom" for my birthday. I may have mentioned it before, as it is one of my favorite little books! I keep it on my desk and whenever I'm feeling stuck, uninspired or just need a little pick me up... I fan through the bent pages to find whatever answer I might be looking for!

...There is always an answer!

So, today feeling a little less motivated, but still wanting to maintain the steam of my "new and improved" positive outlook, I decided to focus on this advice:

"If you're too busy to laugh, you're too busy!"

I actually laughed out loud when I read it! Because, in large part it's true. Only 26 days into the new year, and the comforts of my old outlook and patterns of life are sneaking their way back in.

Well, I'm just not going to let that happen. It's always easier to do what is easy; give in to the negative thoughts and or get lazy... But in order to make the most of this year, and the start of the next ten years, I'm making the choice to make room for the laughter in life. Because when this year started, I was laughing a lot... and a lot of great things we're happening!

Alright... pep talks over. Bring on today, and bring on the laughs!

...slipping already?

...this is by far the latest entry to date. I'm really cutting it close to my dead line. Which begs the question; "Am I slipping already?"

I'd like to say: No. However, I think there may be some truth to that...

It's only January 25, 2010... and I'm already allowing my positive energy and outlook fade.

So, I have to change that pronto!

How do you solve a problem that you already know the answer to?

You dig deep, and remember that it only takes 30 seconds of a fake smile to trigger a real genuine laugh!

...and if you're laughing, then you're having fun. ...and I get a lot more creative when I'm having fun!

Late To Bed... Early To Rise...

Late to bed... early to rise,

Makes me cranky, evil and unable to think of something cleaver that rhymes with rise!

...oh, wise!

I usually love to get up early in the morning, however, it's not as easy when you party like a rock star the night before...

P.S. I think I'm a little too old to be partying like a rock star! ...Especially because I'm not a rock star! ...and I have to go to work!

I Love Video Games!!!

Tonight I felt like I was in 7th grade again!

After a long day of work on a Saturday... I decided to spend my evening playing Wii video games!

Okay, so admittedly I'm terrible at video games, and always have been...

But I love to play them! ...and I love it even more when I have a group of friends (that remind me of my friends from 7th grade) to play them with!

I love any excuse to feel 12 again!

Raise Your Hand if You're Over 30...

Flash back: ...about 6 years ago at Vintage Bar on 9th Avenue in New York City (When it was still okay to smoke inside.) Several of my friends and I were enjoying champagne cocktails on a Tuesday afternoon. It was normal for each of us to meet up around five or six o'clock and spend time drinking, gossiping about bullshit, and drinking more!

We were young, in a show (so we had money) and very ambitious. Like most twenty-somethings in New York, we thought we knew everything! More importantly, we loved making each other laugh... And nobody was off limits!

So, this particular afternoon the four of us were sitting at the bar drinking and laughing... and before we knew it, we'd each had about 4 glasses of champagne... One of my friends (who shall remain nameless...) gets off her bar stool without saying a word, walks to a woman at the other end of the bar (who was REALLY OVER US) picked up her cigarette lighter, took it, and brought it back to where we were sitting. My friend then proceeds to light her cigarette, walk back to the other end of the bar and dropped the lighter back down in front of the angry woman...

The three of us watched our friend do this in total silence! She never asked to borrow the lighter or thank the angry woman after she had...

Once our friend was comfortably seated at her bar stool with her lit cigarette, the four of us just burst out into full laughter...

The angry woman was not pleased and she shouted, "That was incredibly rude!"

At which point my friend (the lighter thief) said, "Raise your hand if you're over 30?"

Well, as you can imagine, we lost our shit! We laughed so hard and so long that they threatened to kick us out of the bar...

The angry woman threw her money on the bar, stood up and left!

Well... karma is a bitch!

Flash forward: Today I'm driving to an audition that I really didn't want to go to.... But, because I'm on this kick to stay focused and positive... I woke up, showered, printed out my resume and attached it to my picture, MapQuested the directions, drank a cup of coffee, drove 23 miles into the valley in the pouring rain, searched for 10 minutes to find parking, went through the security checkpoint to get on the sound stage, filled out my paper work, and then the woman collecting our information asked to see my ID...

Me: "My Id? Why do you need that?"

Woman: "Oh, because we're only seeing actors 18-30 for this job..."

Me: "Oh, well my agent didn't tell me that..."

Woman: "How old are you?"

Me: "....thir... thirt... thirty.. thirty-one...."

Woman: "Oh, I'm so sorry... You can't audition for this."

Me: "Okay."

...I got in my car and at first, I was pissed! But then I just started laughing out loud like I did the day my friends and I were sitting in Vintage!

The fact is, I am now the thirty-something year old joke! Ha! But, it will happen to everyone! After all- growing older is better than dying!

...and hey, at least I got a good laugh at 8 AM!

...Another 2010 Goal I Get to Cross Off!

I know, I know... This need I have to cross things off lists is crazy (see To Do List post from January 12, 2010) however, I'm pleased to report that since my last entry I have not added to the list! Further more, I have been able to cross two things off! Among them is my new acting "sizzle reel" which is just very short clips of some of the things I've done mixed together! So, for today's entry.... Allow me to introduce my "Sizzle Reel!" ...I hope it leaves you sizzling or at least reeling for more!

Little Wet Convertible

Little green convertible, how I love thee so!

Driving to the beach or work we're always on the go,

You're small and ghetto, that's okay

cause when the sun's out we love to play!

Dents and dings, ripped upholstery, key marks on the hood,

You run like a champ through it all, so all I see is good!

But when it rains... and floods and pours,

The water rushes through the doors;

it soaks the seats and mats and floors,

It's like a lake and I need oars!

It drives me crazy to sit and stew,

In the nasty, watery pooh!

Oh, little wet convertible.... I really hate you!

Happiness Is A Form of Courage.

I woke up today and was a little upset that it's still raining in LA...

...Okay, I'll be honest, I was pissed! However, I'm really trying to stay focused on positive energy, because as hard to believe as it sounds... staying enthusiastic over the past 18 days in 2010 have already lead to excellent new opportunities!

So I decided to take a peek inside one of my favorite little books (that I keep on my desk and flip through from time to time) called 8,789 Words of Wisdom. I cannot say that all 8,789 words are that wise, but I will note that the phrases that jumped off the page this morning all had a common theme:

Happiness.

After reading several of the smart words on happiness, I began to smile...

I'm not sure if it was because I realized that I was talking myself into a good mood or if the shrewd little idioms were actually working... but a felt a confident shift in my attitude toward the day, rain be damned!

My favorite: "Happy people change what does not make them happy."

I understood that quote, because it was working right in front of me... and has been for the past 18 days!

I've known for sometime, that to be happy is a choice that takes effort. You cannot wake up happy everyday. But in less than 15 minutes, you can probably find the courage to search for the happiness that I'm sure is there lurking around. ...don't be afraid to dig deep!

I Hate The Rain!

The way I see it, if I loved the rain... I'd live in Seattle, WA!
Not sunny California!!!
I'm trying to find the positive side of wet jeans, soggy socks, and a
convertible that's soaked with water...

Okay... Found it!
...Rain day! No work, heads down, thumbs up!

A Golden Night...

T-minus 7 hours and 42 minutes until the 67th Annual Golden Globes ceremony!

I admit it, I'm a geek. I love awards shows and have since I was a kid... There's something magical that happens when you put a lot of big movie stars in a room.

...and I'm aware how many jokes can be made about that last statement.

But I think there's some truth to it...

For me, it's so inspiring to see someone receive an award (most of the time unexpectedly) for their work and be so moved. It reminds me that most people, famous or not, set goals, have big dreams and hope to aspire to be at the top of their craft.

Plus it's a perfect opportunity to throw a party with a group of your (still struggling) but very talented friends. Eat too much, drink too much, make fun of the bad fashion, and cry when someone delivers a heartfelt acceptance speech.

So, no more time to write... I've got a house to clean, food to prep and champagne to chill!

P. S. There's a new "Big Love" on tonight too, so it's a Golden night for sure!

I Love Lazy Saturdays!

There is nothing better than waking up (a little later than normal) to the delicious aroma of coffee being brewed... I slowly make my way out of bed and into the living room to turn on Saturday morning cartoons (though I miss the Smurfs, Snorkels and Scooby Doo!)

I open up the french doors that lead out to my balcony and step outside for a moment to let the rays of sunlight beat down on my forehead and wake up the brain cells...

I pull out two or three magazines from the stack that goes unread throughout the week, and dive in to the glossy pages with the smell of advertisement cologne!

I make my way into the kitchen, pour a cup of coffee, grab a frying pan and make my favorite breakfast from when I was a kid (not cereal) Egg in a Basket! (See picture above) I love the smell of the butter and egg in the frying pan, mixed with the rich bold coffee that fills the air...

Maybe I'll take a shower, later, and take a drive along the coast... or stop by a garage sale or go to the park... Or maybe I'll just stay home and do nothing...

That's the wonderful thing about Saturdays, they have no rules whatsoever!

God, it's going to suck next Saturday when I have to work!

Martini Break!!!

Every now and then in my life, I have to take a moment... sit back... relax.... and drink a dirty martini extra dirty with three olives!

...today is one of those days!

Here's to enjoying life, one day at a time!

The More Possessions, the More Worry

Growing up, I had this terrible fear of loss- of both people and possessions.

I was so afraid that a fire was going to burn down my house with all of my treasures or I was going to wake up one day and my grandma would be gone...

Of course as I got older I realized that eventually I will lose many loved ones before I'm ready, and my fear of losing sentimental objects grew even stronger.

I was nervous that a flood might destroy all of my family photos, or a thief would break in and steal all of my valuables. As time passed, I began to work out this fear, acknowledging that a deeper issue was at hand.

Now, I make it a point to release my fears, along with any objects that become more important than the memory said object is associated to. (Often times it's tough to give away something that was once so important...) Nevertheless, the action of letting go is so liberating. Moreover, it allows me to stay focused on the present and move forward in life.

Sadly one of my greatest fears has happened, not to me, but to an entire country: Haiti

Watching the impact of what a 7.o earthquake had on Haiti and the devastation it leaves behind, is both painful and heartbreaking. I cannot begin to imagine the despair, loss and fear the families that have been affected by this disaster are going through.

What I've learned over time is that there is no greater possession than that of a loved one. My love and prayers go out to every single person affected by this awful disaster. May all of your "possessions" find their way home either on earth or in heaven... and my deepest gratitude for everyone involved in the relief, recovery and healing process.

On Cloud 9!

Everyday is a good day when you wake up alive...

However, today was an excellent day! It looks like my positive resolutions and goals are already working in my favor... and if this keeps up, 2010 will be AWESOME!

I had a meeting with a new agency today, and it was like a dream.

It's always wonderful when a meeting is fun, productive and both parties feel like they're gaining something exceptional from the other... Today was just that!

After thirteen years of taking meetings and hearing all of the (sometime hideous) things people will say to your face in this business...

It is magnificent to knock it out of the park! ...and get a call from your manager confirming that the feelings are mutual!

I'm so happy tonight! I will try to keep this feeling for at least two more days (God knows how hard that can be in LA) and then I will continue to focus on the positive goals that I believe will ultimately lead me to the next adventure on my journey!

"To Do" List

I love that I make "To Do" lists for my lists of things "To Do"

i.e. I will come up with a list of all of the lists I need to make in order to feel like everything gets the attention it deserves... What's really funny? Is that I get so overwhelmed with the idea of all the different lists, that I don't even know where to begin.

I love being organized. I enjoy even more, crossing tasks that I've completed off of a list...

What I'm noticing though... Is that sometimes, less is more!

In 2010, I'm trying to stay every bit as organized and focused as in past years, however, I'm striving to find more balance too. I want to let the unexpected surprise me in great ways too!

The struggle I find with my lists is that I'm only happy when I get to cross it off! Otherwise I look down and think, "oh God, I still haven't done that?!"

So for an alternative to the endless lists I assign myself in life... I'm going to try to make one list of the 5 most important things I think I need to accomplish in my life from day to day... and I WILL NOT let myself start a new list until ALL 5 of those tasks are completed!

...it's going to be EXTREMELY difficult, but I will do my best to stick to it!

I'll let you know how it goes! (Unless I forget because it doesn't make the list!)

The View Was Clear Today...

After a wonderful hike to the top of Doheny Estates today, I sat at the top of the hill and gazed out at the sparkling view from Malibu to downtown Los Angeles. It was gorgeous!

...and then like a ton of bricks it hit me! The passion and fire to "make it" that motivated me throughout school and into my early 20's.

Every bit (if not more) than when I was a kid, because the stakes are higher now. I've been working non-stop for the past 13 years toward my goal.

What was also clear is how much I've sacrificed for my dreams... Not that I regret a single instance, only that in so many ways, I have made it! I've been making it everyday... and the fact that I didn't give up somewhere along the failed attempts to reach the next level and pack up and move back home is in almost a bigger accomplishment than my end goal!

The view reminded me of how eager I was in my 20's to achieve success regardless of the negative throws in my direction. Of course, as time passes and the journey continues, each "blow" begins to feel more and more personal, and almost a "sign" that maybe it isn't meant to be...

That's when I said to myself, "Who's to say that to me, except me?!" If I still love what I do and want to continue the fight to achieve it, then why shouldn't I.

I have to remember that feeling... as I'm sure the pressure to "throw in the towel" will come up from time to time as I continue climbing up my ladder in life...

What was so clear to me today (beside the glitter off the Pacific Ocean) is something I knew about myself a long time ago and forgot: I can accomplish anything I set out to do!

Looking back over the career and life I've had so far is a perfect record of that...

So as 2010 marks the start of a new year and a new decade, it also coincides with the start of my 30's...

I guess in a way, it was important for me to "lose" myself for a few years and forget the power, drive and talent I have inside... So that I can remind myself from here on out, that I have a purpose and I will not rest until I've climbed up to it!

It's Back!

After several long months of waiting... the return of my favorite show on television came tonight at 9:00 PM on HBO... "Big Love" is back and better than ever!

Bill Paxton, Jeanne Tripplehorn, Ginnifer Goodwin and Chloe Sevigny are 4 huge reasons why the show that follows the trials and tribulations of a Mormon family practicing polygamy in Utah is so brilliant! Every single actor on the show, from the c0-stars to the Guest Stars are pitch perfect in their subtle, yet dead on emotion and mannerism of the characters they portray.

Coupled with the smart, engrossing and unbelievable (but never cheesy) writing that pushes the envelope and dares to explore controversial themes that mirror today's social, religious and political ideas.

The icing on the cake would have to be how the show is shot and directed... Every episode is like watching a mini movie that you don't want to end!

So load up the popcorn, turn on HBO and sit back and enjoy the new season of "Big Love!" ...if you aren't already a huge fan, check out HBO on demand and watch them back to back... I promise you'll fall in "Big Love!"

...I took a day off... to go to the beach in January!

There's nothing better than a beautiful day at the beach in LA in January!

I had such a wonderful mid-winter summer break...

Isn't it funny...

...that no matter how little you have to accomplish in a day, it still feels like you run out of time?
Take this blog entry for example... I've known all day that I needed to write something, and still I sit scrambling at the last minute to think of a topic and write down my feelings.
The simplest tasks are always the worst too! Like when you just have to send that one email response before you go to dinner...
You sit down in front of the computer and you don't even know where to begin.
I can't believe that the ONLY thing I had on my list of things to do today was to write this blog entry, and I'm just now sitting down to do it at 11:23 PM!
Somehow, I found a way to fill my day with one useless activity after another (all of which seemed extremely important at the time) only to realize that all I did was eat too much and NOT go to the gym...
...I did finish my taxes though, so I guess I accomplished something... that and I did finish thi

time of my life!

I had such an excellent time tonight! Thank you to Eric, Rob, Michael, James, Ilana, Amy, Patrick and Jason!
It was so awesome to be in the company of so many funny, talented, brilliant people!

Ode to Starbucks

Starbucks brings me so much joy it is my one life's pleasure,
Grande, Venti, iced and hot... I love to drink it's treasure,
And when I have no money, I can't go without it's taste-
I live for Starbucks coffee, mine at home's no measure!

The Welcome Home Treatment...

I arrived back in LA today, after an excellent visit with my family, and was looking forward to today's blog post...
It's supposed to be a top ten list of: Why I Love Being Back in LA

Unfortunately I got back to an unexpected surprise! ..MY CAR WON"T START!!! So here I am sitting in my apartment waiting for roadside assistance to come and jump start my car (God I pray that's all that's wrong with it!) and I'm going to be late to the classes I teach...

Oh well, in the theme of keeping with my 2010 resolutions- I will not worry about this, because there really is nothing I can do about it! So, on with the top ten reasons:

Why I Love Being Back in LA

1. 75 degrees in January
2. Coffee shops on every corner (that stay open past 8 PM)
3. My friends
4. My house
5. My brand new HD Flat Screen
6. The Beach
7. Working on projects I love!
8. Writing on my balcony
9. Watching the sunset
10. Coffee shops on every corner (that stay open past 8 PM) ...trust me, it's worth mentioning at least 4 more times!

...So there you have it. Not a truly inspiring blog post, but I'm very proud of myself for not raging and freaking out and wanting to bust out every window in my car, and then throwing my piece of sh%t iPhone down and stomping on it (because AT&T sucks and the service never works) and then running into my house and eating while crying because life's not fair!
I don't do things like that anymore, because in 2010 things are going to be different!

...Love on a conveyor belt?

Wow. Tonight I just watched "The Conveyor Belt of Love" a new show on ABC...
It's hard to believe that a show like this made it on air... it's even harder to believe that I watched the whole thing, and shouted my thoughts at the television screen!

The premise of the show; five women enter the set on a conveyor belt as if coming out of a Barbie factory... during a brief on-camera confessional we learn how shallow or crazy these women are... and it's followed up by forty-five "Ken" wannabes, who come out one after another and these five women decided if they're "interested" or "not interested."

...I wish I could say I was not interested, however, I found it strangely fascinating. Not like watching a train wreck. More like walking past your kitchen window and catching a glimpse into your neighbors bed room while they're having sex and you can't stop watching...

What I found the most bizarre, is just how dumb guys can be while they're trying to pick up on women... and how desperate girls are to be entertained.

I'm not sure that I'll go out of my way to watch it again next week, but I can't wait for the spin-off:
"Assembly Line of Divorce!"

Like Father... Like Son...

There's nothing like being home for the holidays to give you a good dose of your own medicine.
Today, I saw in my dad, what so many of my friends must see in me. Not that I haven't seen it before... but today, I saw it from a new perspective.
After a deliciously prepared lunch by yours truly... my dad and I got into a discussion over faith and the views of conflicting ideology. A conversation that we've disputed over time and again... often to the point of a yelling match!
Having been down this path before, and because I didn't wish to begin 2010 in a fight with my dad, I decided to take a different approach.
Without getting into the details of our rules of engagement, I will only offer that the very things that drive me mad when my dad and I disagree, are the very traits that I resort to while in conflict with close friends and loved ones.
Likewise, the very passion and emotion that motivates my dad in life is something I admire most about him.
So while I sat there today I tried something new... and the minor adjustment I made while we deliberated, changed the entire tone of the conversation in a positive way.
Leading me to the notion that it is completely possible to maintain passion, emotion and opinion, without attacking the other parties belief.
It was a magical moment today, and an excellent step in the right direction for 2010!
...let's just hope it lasts!

Gram learns to Blog...

Today's entry comes for one reason alone... To teach my gram what a blog is.
I'm still at home visiting family, and I shared with my gram some of my resolutions...
Among them was my goal to write daily on my blog.
Of course gram asked, "A what's a? What's a blog?"
So here I sit with my gram and dad typing today's thoughts.
First I'll ask gram to share her thoughts:

"...I ain't got any thoughts... I'm drawing a blank... I think 2010 is going to be better than 2009, I hope."

I think that sounds good. I agree with my gram that 2010 is going to be wonderful.
Now, I'll ask dad:

"I hope the rest of this year is better than the last two days... so far it's started out pretty crappy!"

I don't agree with my dad, my year has started off very well.

So there you have it. Gram now knows what a Blog is. I'm not sure she is too enthusiastic about it, however, I'm sure that in time she will see the positive effect it has on my creativity and further appreciate my blogging.

I can already tell that blogging every day is going to make me a genius! ...well maybe not, but it'll give me something to do!

2010 is my year!

...and so it is, the first day of 2010 and the beginning of a new decade is here.
Strange, I usually get very sad and reflective on New Year's Eve, yet this year I was utterly happy and grateful. Which makes me proud and positive that I achieved the majority of my goals and resolutions in 2009. (One of which has been on my list for many years... and now I feel like I may be getting much more accomplished at: Living in the moment!)

Of course I'm not perfect, nor did I finish every single objective... I was 3 away from a perfect year!

All and all, I've stayed very true to a well balanced year. So, in continuing with the theme of last year, and expanding on it with growth and enlightenment, I don't wish to continue talking about 2009 anymore.

2010 is my year!

I am more confident about the coming 364 days then ever before! I'm not sure where the motivation came from, or why... However, I have no intention of questioning it! Only to use this steam as the driving force to make EVERY single goal and resolution in this year to advance me further into my passion for living a full life and creating projects that satisfy my desire as an artist.

I've spent the greater part of my life working night and day toward my dream and passion, and what I've only just recently realized is that I'm living my dream every day! ...and have been for the last decade.

My grandma reminded me of something I've heard a thousand times before, and for some reason I heard it in a new way this past week...

She said, "You've spent the last 12 years of your life, waking up doing what you love and dreamed about your whole life... and you've gotten by just fine!"

The last part in particular is what moved me. For so long the idea of "getting by" killed me! I wanted more than that! I've worked so hard and had dreamed as a kid that by this time in my life I'd not only be "getting by" but I would have "made it" by now.

I guess for the past five or six years, I've been consumed with all the things wrong with following my passion and working towards my career, that I've failed to see that I am "making it" every day! I'm creating my own projects and blazing my own path. I didn't give up. That is "making it!" Not just in LA as an entertainer, but in life.

EVERYONE is "getting by." We all aspire for more. We all dream of bigger things. What I completely understand now, is that I LOVE what I do. I'm blessed that I'm able to wake up every day and create... and the "bigger things" will come in time.

Living a balanced life involves realizing that some things are out of our control, and thus part of walking that tight rope is knowing the things we can change and accepting to find a way around the things we cannot.

I've decided that one of my goals for 2010 will be to post a blog a day! It is a huge undertaking, one that I'm not entirely sure I fully realize, nevertheless I'm going to do it!

I see it as an extension of the journal I already write in on a fairly daily basis...
It will be tough to balance in addition to the creative projects I want to accomplish, and the book I'm already half way through writing (and was supposed to be finished with by January 1st 2010) but I will grow from this exercises.

I'm on the fence about forcing myself to write if I'm not feeling creative at that moment in time, but I thought, "What the hell? Why not! The best way be creative, is to stay creative!"

...so here goes! This is entry 1 of 365. If all goes well, this will be one of several big goals I have for the coming year that will launch me into the next chapter of my life... or as I like to call it: The Decade of my Thirties!

...the long awaited rap video!

Those of you that have the courage... check out my latest parody! It's my take on the rap scene in LA... Warning: This Video Contains Adult Content and Language... (and it's a parody... so it's all in good fun!)

Oh snap! I just shot my rap video... fo' shizzle!

It's not very often that I'm so excited about a rap video... But when it's mine and it's off the hook... I'm stoked! I had a blast writing the song while I was working in San Francisco! I was hanging with a few close friends in San Francisco's Little Italy section, and the vino was flowin'... Several bottles and a lot of food later, we were hanging out in my hotel room laughing, acting wild and listing to the song Ego over and over again! ...I got so inspired (and shocked at just how much rappers get away with singing about) and decided to write my own rap song. ...One thing lead to the next, and before I knew it, I had an extremely vulgar and hilarious rap of my own... Naturally I decided to put a music video together once I got back to LA. ...and with the help of Jeff Payton my Director and two of my favorite girls... the video is in the can and being edited as I write!

Check out my latest video!

Good things happen to good people! ...Sometimes.

Do good things really happen to good people? That's what a friend of mine just reminded me.. I know she was most likely doing her best to encourage me to keep the faith, so to speak... However, I really wonder more and more if good things really come to only good people...

Of course, there is no way to really measure the truth in a statement like that. Let's face facts, good things happen to good people, but they also happen to bad people too!

I'm beyond frustrated with where I am in life right now. I say this knowing that I have so much to be grateful for. Nevertheless, I'm disappointed that lately, the harder I work for something, the further I push it away.

I believe that if you work at something hard enough and long enough, more than likely you will be able to accomplish your goal... Honestly, I try to focus only positive energy into the goals and dreams that I harbor.

I'm the king of mantras... In fact, I have quotes and affirmations framed all over my house... and yet, there are moments when you just want to scream at the top of your lungs: "IT'S NOT FAIR!!! WHEN IS IT GOING TO BE MY TURN!"

I think the scariest realization for me, is that no matter how hard you work and how much you want something... It really may not happen... So do you continue to focus your energy into something that may or may not pay off? I'm really asking that question... I don't have the answer anymore. I used to believe that you really can accomplish anything you put your mind to... Now, I'm not so sure...

I've made it a point, since watching "Finding Nemo" to remember the wise words of a cartoon fish:
"just keep swimming, just keep swimming..."
But lately, I'm not sure if I'm just treading water or worse, swimming in the wrong direction!

How come you can't Google "Will I succeed?" and get the answer you're looking for? You can Google everything else!
UUUuuuuhhhhhhhhhhggggGGGG!

Too much to do... and not enough sleep!

Uhggggg..... Don't you hate when you're wide awake, and the rest of the world is fast asleep? I'm one of those people who cannot stop thinking about all of the unfinished business for the day... I either have to do it, or lay in bed wide awake thinking about it. Regardless of my decision, the outcome is usually always a losing situation: If I stay up and finish the work, it's not well thought out or polished (much like this blog I'm writing now...) on the other hand, if I just sit in bed and stew... I don't get any sleep, and therefore I'm even less creative the next day!
I wish we had that function that my Mac computer has... you know the one? Where the computer puts itself to sleep after a specified time of inactivity.
I have too many projects and not enough time... and instead of working on any of them right now, I'm focused on complaining about how much I have to do! ...and let's not forget... I set the goals and the time lines! So instead of giving myself a break, I've continually pushed myself to stay active and keep on creating!
So, now that I got that off my chest, I believe I can finish working on the things that are important to me...
Like Twitter and Facebook! Good night!

Am I really in my thirties?

It's like I went to bed after a long night out at the Hudson Hotel with a group of my crazy best friends in my 20's... and woke up 31!
It's just a thought that I needed to get it off my chest... I'm not afraid of age or dying, I'm just genuinely shocked at how fast the time flies...
I'm really happy that I forced myself to enjoy as much of my 20's as I could... Now it's time for me to stop worrying about being 31 and start enjoying this decade... so that when 40 comes (sooner that I want it too, I'm sure!) I won't be freaked out about how fast my 30's went...
I have to continue to remind myself that I am a constant work in progress and the only finish line is death... and now that I've done so on the internet, I have released my fear and I can party like a rock star through my 30's too!

Love Not Hate

Love Not Hate

I Love Malibu...

It was a very busy three day Memorial weekend for me and my friends... I spent much time giving thanks to all of those brave men and woman who have served to keep the country I LOVE- "land of the free and home of the brave" So grateful to the Veterans who fought to protect our rights regardless of their own personal, religious and or political views...
Of course I found some time to party too...

I Hate AT&T

I'm so tired of having the same conversation over, and over, and over, and over, and over again with AT&T! I talk to their customer support team more than my family or any of my friends... Enough is enough! Of course, I would have to have the iPhone the amazing gadget that is unfortunately attached to AT&T exclusively! This is just one of the thousands of conversations that I've had with AT&T...

Mr. StarTalent Returns

Hey friends, fans (my family) and fellow bloggers! This is one of the sketch characters I've been working on... Not sure if art imitates life or the other way around... but I do know that I have a lot of fun creating fake scenarios and exploring the personalities of others at my real life jobs!

Join Mr. StarTalent as he explores this pseudo journey into the very real world of talent competitions...

Latest Benny Ghettofunk Video...

Meet Benny Ghettofunk Hip-hop Choreographer to the Stars...
His skills have kept him in demand from coast to coast. Having worked with Britney, Lindsay and J- Lo just to name a few... Now he gets to add the King of Pop himself... Michael Jackson!

Trip to Malibu Beach video... Just for fun!

I know I'm a dork... but I LOVE going to the beach... and I love the song "Wipe Out!" So I decided to put together a short video combining my love for LA, the beach and filming... to an awesome song! "Wipe Out" by The Surfaris

If you're in LA you have to check out Skaf's Grill...

I know, I know the valley right? But trust Michael Cornacchia on this one! He brought me to this delicious gem of a restaurant several years ago... And I've been enjoying it ever since!

Skaf's Grill
6008 Laurel Canyon Blvd
North Hollywood, CA 91606
(818) 985-5701

No More Hydroxycut?!?

It was a sad day Saturday... The good people at Hydroxycut decided to remove their product from the shelves after many reports of liver damage...